Cowgirl In The Sand
by Hell's Nightingale
Summary: Soifon is delirious as blood escapes her wounds. She wants to live, but can't help finding peace in the thought of death. Written for Songfic challenge in the YoruSoi FC Yoruichi appears...and wants her to die. YoruSoi SoiYoru Implications of Yuri


Soifon nestled into the warmth, the hard, lumpy, earthy bed. She followed the movements of the falling and landed. The irritating sand splashed on impact and descended onto her. Where she was, she didn't even know. Her hands sprung and clenched into the sand, hoping to latch onto the control she lost. Her heartbeat softened and the blood in her wounds stopped leaking, for now. Her eyes stared at the full moon that loomed overhead like a stage prop, never moving or changing. Its dusty, crater infested rocks mocked her, _go to sleep_. Whispery voices of harpies and the sultry succubus, she wouldn't fall for it. Death was something she was incapable of doing. Her job was to live and protect. A dead, rotting corpse couldn't save anybody. Her eyes closed. _Everybody needs a break_, Soifon's eyes sprang open. Nobody especially her had the right to want death. It was the final and most selfish act, to die because one wanted to. She had promises to keep. She would not die in…_Hueco Mundo_. Soifon's eyes closed again and snapped them open. _Dammit, don't be like this!_  
_  
Sleep is inevitable, my dear._ Soifon twisted her arms to claw her head. Get out. She didn't need to hear these depressing footnotes. She had enough of the wallowing despite the few seconds she leisurely walked into her emotions. It wasn't even apparent she had ventured into her heart, but she was there. Hardly anything was there but wild dreams and insanity of a stupid girl who lived in a land she only dreamt of. Soifon cursed under her breath. Why hasn't she killed this? It was a hindrance. Soifon dragged her nails from her pounding temples to her fleshy cheeks. _An immature body, Soifon, _she bit her lip.

"Hello little girl," a deep, wicked voice welcomed in a suave voice, Soifon opened her cracked lips to suck in the air the voice gave. She opened her eyes, how did they get closed again… she looked to her abdomen, now noticing the faint weight that occupied it. A lusciously furred black cat sat upon it, a throne for a majestic being. Soifon's wind burnt skin went ablaze with sudden life. The blood spurted from her arm again. The cat's golden eyes slowly averted to the red liquids, greeting them with calmness. Soifon closed her eyes. She delirious, Yoruichi couldn't be here_…too much loss of blood_.

_Go to sleep, she will be there._

"Hello Yoruichi-sama." Soifon breathed. Strength was drained by the leech of battle. Her willpower to look responsive, strong, and threatening seeped into the sand below that dashed across her skin in gales.

"Mind if I stay and talk?" The black cat asked. Soifon cracked an eye open to examine it. How transparent the body was to her. On cue, the cat's form disintegrated with the sand. Soifon's eyes opened wider. The presence of the cat never left, but its physical appearance was gone.

"Yes." She croaked. The cat appeared with a Cheshire grin, its demonic fangs glistened. _How evil she is now, look upon her constricted throat and the mock it flares. _Soifon held her hands to her ears. This was not her inner-conscious. She looked upon the feline and noticed the stoic attitude, not regarding her current injuries. _You could bleed to death but—_ Soifon gritted her teeth_. She_ would care…_she_ would…the cat's grin faltered into the competitive smirk that was infamous. Soifon closed her eyes again. She didn't want to see it. _Go to sleep…_

"Giving up already, girl?" The cat gloated. Soifon lightly stirred underneath its perch.

"Why do you want to die? You think it'd be better? To be reishi, constructed into a part of the soul society like nothing? Well, I would've thought better."

Soifon shook her head, "I don't want to die."

The cat gave a throaty, mechanical laugh. It echoed in the wastelands. "My dear child, you don't know what you want. Halfway between a dream-filled child and daft adult, but you know nothing better than the one you were before and what you're going to become." Soifon cringed as her brows furrowed. What was it talking about?

"Yoruichi-sama, I don't understand. What are you saying?" Soifon couldn't translate her words into comprehendible sentences. It was a riddle that didn't want to be solved.

"I nurtured you as a small child with my milk, my wisdom and power, and yet you're going to throw it all away for a rumored afterlife. What are you trying to achieve?" The cat hissed. Its tail dangerously swatted from side to side as its lips snarled.

"My _ugly_, **beautiful **disciple, what is your mind conjuring as an excuse to accept death with happy arms? Am I not good enough to live on for?" The cat reared its tongue and spat upon Soifon's collarbone. The distaste thickened the hot air. Soifon wanted to see Yoruichi and her smile, the reassuring smile, the only thing that made her efforts seem satisfactory.

"No one to love, no one to care, nothing to strive for…what else do you want from me?" Soifon asked. The cat removed its hate as it softened.

_That plan will not work…go to sleep._

"Child, you're old enough to determine your own name and course. You're not a moon." The male's voice died down to a soft murmur. Soifon lingered in the darkness before opening her eyes again, staring at the dull moon.

"Why do you fight me on my desires then?" She asked the black mass on her.

"You don't know what you want. I'm confronting you and your limitless options, helping you figure what you want. Force did not work." Yoruichi spoke. Soifon sighed. _She's here._

"I don't know. One part of me wants this and the other—"

"Your woman side?" Yoruichi offered. Soifon scowled. What did her gender have anything to do with this?

"What do you mean? How does my sex play any role with this?" _Running out of energy, sleep, _Soifon felt the blood ooze.

"Women tend to go for what they think is best, continue living and go through much pain and countless decades of mental pain, or, die in peace and with the thought you tried. What you've been trained to do is telling you to get up and fight, but your woman mind is forgiving, saying it's ok to sleep for just one minute, everyone deserves it. And Soifon, you do deserve a break." Soifon's eyes jolted wide. Her body lurched up as the cat delicately jumped off, landed, and took seat in the moving sand. Soifon's heart raced as the blood began to gush.

"You…" Soifon began as the cat's ears twitched, its steady eyes watched, and the wet nose gleamed in the moonlight.

"Want you dead?" It finished. Soifon flinched. "Did you not hear me before? I don't want you dead but simply want you to rest."

Soifon shook her head. "But you just said resting was death? How can I die and come back alive when I'm ready?"

The cat's ears lurched back as its eyes narrowed into a feral glare. "How can you say you hate me then love me in less than an hour when we fought?"

Soifon shook at the sudden change. She did say she hated her very existence at one point but she didn't mean it. Yoruichi knew that. The cat flickered like a hologram before regaining its full image again.

"You're not Yoruichi-sama." Soifon spat as she shuffled backwards, her feet digging into the sand as her hands propelled her further away, blood following along like rubies in the dust. The cat stood up and walked towards Soifon.

"You're becoming desperate now. Why are you running away from the truths that you cannot back up? Despite being a shinigami, you're still human." The cat spoke quietly, its paws sliding across the sand.

The cat's voice conflicted Soifon's voice like a velvet song into an erratic guitar solo, however each interwove into a story played within the ears. Soifon felt her heart grip. This wasn't Yoruichi.

"What are you trying to do to me?" Soifon questioned. The cat's image blurred again.

"Soifon, wake up." Yoruichi's voice called out evenly. Soifon's heart pounded faster. The cat's image returned once again.

"Rubbish, utter rubbish, go to sleep Soifon. Soul society is the final resting place. You will be reincarnated into something greater, I assure of it. We can be together then, die arm in arm, and live forever with our reishi mixed. Our energy can be regenerated into a beautiful, blooming sakura tree. Won't you like that?" Its voice asked in a sickly sweet tone as it regained its position on Soifon's body again. The cat lazily rolled to the side, belly up to the sky, and licked its lips.

"To die with me, wouldn't that be grand?" It purred. Soifon pushed the feline away. "Soifon, for you I'd take my life away right here to be with you again, in a different life and together without restrictions."

Soifon gritted her teeth as she tried to find her sword. Where did it go? What was going on?

"You're not Yoruichi-sama." She roared as she tried to get to her feet. She felt like chains were connected on her arms. Why did she feel constricted?

"Soifon, don't you love me? Why are you trying to leave me?" The cat asked in a panicked voice. It was becoming frantic. "I love you. Don't leave." The background turned grey as the cat blurred out again.

"Soifon, come back."

_Sleep, sleep, sleep!_

Soifon rushed off into the sands, wobbling all the way as blood flowed into the wind like reckless silk. The cat ran after her. The world began to spin. The moon became a rose, petals falling, the sand into piercing daggers, the cat into a hollow, the wastelands transformed into the soul society then Karakura town, the sky changed into hundreds of different colors, and until finally, Soifon felt something soft touch her lips. She stopped running and everything turned black as she looked down to find a sole, white feather on her lips.

Her eyes snapped open as she gasped for air. Her eyes darted everywhere from her cement bed. The medics raced from side to side, gathering all the captains around her. Unohana followed. She could hear Hitsuguya screaming at the medics to attend to Hinamori instead of him. She saw Kurosaki with a bloodied sword, staring at a lifeless body clung in white, blood drenched clothes.

"The captains were—"a medic reported.

"Aizen is dead—"Kira announced.

"Illusion has—"Unohana began.

"I saw the strangest things—"Shunsui spoke.

"Aizen is dead? HOW? I was in Soul Society—"Ukitake asked with surprise.

"Must've ended when he died—"

"I was at the bar—"

"I was training my team—"

"Used to distract the captains while—"

"Good thing or he would got double—"

"Thankfully Captains are ok."

"Illusions caused Captains to think they were—"

"The girls at the bar were wonderful!"

Soifon closed her eyes and breathed. Where was she? She opened her eyes again and found two, bright, golden orbs staring at her with a soft smile. _She was here all along._

"Way to stick it in there, cowgirl, tough ride?" Her assuring voice rang throughout Soifon's ears. How sweet, sweet her smile and voice was… Soifon's muscles and heart relaxed, the blood dripping from her wounds began to slow down.

"Yes, Yoruichi-sama." Soifon smiled and closed her eyes again.

_Stay awake, please, stay awake, _Soifon hummed to herself.

_

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_

**A/N:**

Relations to the song:

'Old enough to change your name' shows individulism and freedom. Yoruichi's illusion, at first, tries to tear it down so Soifon would give into her sleep (death).  
Sand was the main theme of the settting due to the metaphoric idea of it, "Always slipping through your hands/Once you think you have it, you don't."  
Yoruichi says cowgirl because cowgirl = rides cows = super, super hard and brutal experience.  


**The illusional Yoruichi mocks Soifon and her childish behaviors that are expressed in the real world, confronting her on everything she's uneasy on pretty much which pushes her into a weakned stated. With that, the illusional Yoruichi is sought support to Soifon, like a boat in a stormy, dark sea searching for a lighthouse. 'Yoruichi' could've easily done away with Soifon in the end, convincing her to sleep into her death due from the loss of blood and extreme exhaustion. **

**The cat flicked because the real Yoruichi was there at the site, near Soifon, trying to keep her awake. **

**I thought I'd clarify because this probably seemed quite confusing. Saying that makes me fail as a writer. FAIL. The rest can be left to your imagination.**

Read and Review if you pity me haha. 


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